The Institute for Analytical Brilliant Independent Terrific Consistent Reports About Politics (IFABITCRAP) released a new report to mark Scotland’s “Independence Day” which claimed that Scottish independence would have been more disappointing than Indiana Jones 4.
The report on interdependence, called ‘Mundane Observations on the Modern Interconnected World’, said that Scotland would never really be independent, because if it was independent, it would just be dependent.
“We live in a modern interconnected world,” said the report. “Full of black holes and austerity. It couldn’t be done.”
The Scottish Government were quick to dismiss the report out-of-hand, saying that think-tanks just like “to talk Scotland down” and that “they hate us for our freedoms.”
The report cited movies that had been particular let-downs to make its case against Scottish independence.
“George Lucas struck out on his own with Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, and look what happened.”